womens empowerment

Is the “Nice Girl Syndrome” Sabotaging You?

Nice For What?

Most entrepreneurs stay enthusiastic and ambitious until they are called to get out of their comfort zone and they then become paralyzed with fear. They concern themselves with the criticism of others and begin to throw shade on their own light.

Sounds insane right? Well, it is. Just imagine all the potential wasted in excuse-making, light dimming and lack of confidence. Many entrepreneurs work harder at being nice and liked than nice and paid.

Nice for what, I say.

It is time to give your “nice” self, permission to be:

nice and paid
nice and focused
nice and professional
nice and worthy
nice and confident
nice and shining
nice and winning
nice and…

According to Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office: Unconscious Mistakes Women Make That Sabotage Their Careers. Lois P. Frankel said, Stop making “nice girl” errors that can become career pitfalls, such as:

Mistake #21: Multi-tasking. Just because you can do something, doesn’t mean you should do it.

Mistake #54: Failure to negotiate. Don’t equate negotiation with confrontation.

Mistake #70: Inappropriate use of social media. Once it’s out there, it’s hard to put the toothpaste back in the tube.

Mistake #82: Asking permission. Children, not adults, ask for approval. Be direct, be confident.

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Lucinda Cross speaking at GLE Annual event hosted by Yandy Smith-Harris

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“The Passion + Purpose = Profit event on Friday night was super inspiring. The panelists, who included Tiara Williams, Monique Rodriguez, Tamika Mallory, Lucinda Cross, Tashera Simmons, Bershan Shaw and Precious Avorkliyah-Evans, encouraged everyone to put themselves first and do what makes them happy.

Either you can be Passionately Poor or you can be Passionately Profitable. When you are Passionately Poor it means that you are passionate about something, and people see your hard work, but you’re not getting paid. Passionately Profitable is when you are dedicated to your passion and do whatever it takes to brand yourself, and turn that into profits.

Each and every person’s passion is organic. Your Passion is created from what you LOVE plus what you’re GREAT at. If you don’t know what your passion is, you need to get out and experiment with different things you like to do onestop plumbers. If you try something you thought you liked and it does not work, you get up and try the next thing, and then the next thing and then the next until you have found your passion.” —Recap article featured in EGL written by @Tawana Coleman, Speak Free Communications

Click below to read more: http://everythinggirlslove.com/recap-girls-love-events-weekend-2016/

Photo Cred: Santanah Pinto @adorjephotography

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What Makes #Activate2K15Con a Great Event?

38 Days Away

  • A theme that is relevant and purpose driven for business owners and career professionals. (Building Your Empire While Focusing On Family)
  • We ensure that our event participants experience starts way before they even step through the door. (Social Media parties, live networking events, Q&A, ROI ideas)
  • Our website, marketing literature is available & it clearly outlines what the
    event is about and informs participants of the BENEFITS. (http://www.activateconference.com)
  • We have been providing value added content via blogs, videos, post, etc. (posting travel discounts and flight alerts as low as $86 round trip)
  • We are focused on making everyone feel welcome and included via pre-conference.
  • We have taken out the time to listen to what our attendees want to see, hear and do. (frequent Q&A sessions)
  • The agenda is designed to be highly interactive and really engage our audience. (Agenda is listed on conference site. Full agenda will be uploaded August 20th)
  • Our main goal is to stick to the agenda …we understand that this is what people are expecting and have based their travel plans around.
  • We understand that love is in the details so we are organizing a pre-conference rehearsal. (yep! Just like a wedding rehearsal. LOL)
  • We have ordered special items to give participants something to remember their #Activate2K15Con experience. (lots of gifts and prizes)
  • Sponsoring 50 Inner City Teens in Atlanta to be coached and mentored during the special Activate Youth program on Saturday Sept. 19th. (If you are interested in sponsoring a teen 13yr to 18yr email nye@activatingamerica.com)
  • We place God first, the spiritual perspective is important to the Activate Movement.
  • We have special workshops for couples. (We don’t want the men to be excluded)

Hope to see you next month at the Activate Conference in Atlanta, Sept. 18th to the 20th at the Marriott Marquis. For more information visit http://www.activateconference.com

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Faith lessons from an 8yr Old

A pep talk is just what I need sometimes to get me going. Here is a pep talk from a kid who calls himself Kid President, but before we get to the video I want to share a valuable lesson I learned this weekend.

Those of you who follow me on social media know that my daughter is one of my biggest inspirations and she is constantly dropping jewels of wisdom.

This week she introduced to a new level of what some call the Law of Attraction and what I call Faith. Here is what I posted and I would love hear your thoughts or any ah ha moments you had from your children or any child/youth in your life.

Facebook post Part 1: Faith like a child. Today my daughter said “mommy if you pretend enough, God will give it to you.” I said, “what should I pretend?” She said, “start pretending that this is your mansion, and we should start pretending now.” I think I will take her on a visit to Saddle River NJ. I need to see who is occupying my future home.

Facebook post Part 2: This is getting deep. After watching a long movie with Ms. 8yr, I told her I will take her advice and we can go look at some mansions for the vision board. She said “MOMMY NO, that is not the way to do it. Why are you searching for something you already have.” She said its a waste of time to search. She then said “when God checks on you, he is on his big iPad searching for mansions just for you, and checking to see if you really want it.” She then had the nerve to say, “the way to pretend is to go into the living room and act like your walking into your movie room. When you go into your bedroom act like your walking into another room in the mansion.” She said I need to change the way I see every room in the house, starting now. I hope this just set some folks free because I can’t sleep after this, about to go into my Library Room and work on Chapter #4.


Now that I got that out of my system, on to the Pep Talk from Kid President.


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Are You A Disciplined Lead-her?

When it comes to showing up in the world there is a movement called “Authenticity” that is forcing itself upon almost every woman seeking change. Part of the movement involves us as women to embrace change and be transparent with ourselves in order to show up in an impactful and meaningful manner.

The role that most women are being called to is a new form of leadership that I call Lead-her-ship.  This forces each and every woman to remove their limiting beliefs and embrace their greatness, all while leading the next woman to the water. This forces each woman to be the change. This forces each and every woman to unplug from any dogmas, associations and lackluster activities and motives.

That is the disciplined Lead-her…

She knows when to show up and how

She shares her wisdom

She is free

She takes responsibility

She steps up to the plate

She demands respect and gives it

She watches her language and guards her conversation

She believes in investing in herself

She has faith and a vision

She is focused and determined

She is willing to say NO and she is willing to share


Are you a disciplined Lead-her?

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”  Mark Twain (1835-1910)


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3 Lessons I Learned From My HORRIFIC Jet Blue Flight

My worst flight everA lot of people are afraid of dying in a plane crash. I was a Jet Blue lover and rider up until this weekend.  I was heading to Florida to keynote at a fabulous conference. I will fill you in on the grade A, top notch treatment in the next blog post. For now let me share my experience with Jet Blue that taught me a valuable lesson on communication.

Due to the rainy and cloudy weather on Friday I expected some turbulence and delays, but what happened in the first 45 minutes of the ride had me in a state of shock. I thought my prayers of going to another level in life was about to be answered in another form and soon I would be meeting my maker.  lol

The plane made several roller coaster moves, but the last three moves felt as if the plane was falling out of the sky. The plane made a huge drop. People were holding on to each other, screaming and yelling “get me off”, “Oh my God”, you name it and they were yelling it.  The stewardess were not calming the crowd nor comforting the people.

All we heard from the pilot during the huge drop was “crew sit down”.

There were no comforting words, for all we knew we were about die. I have been on plane rides from one hour to 12 hours.  I have never been in a situation where the pilot or his crew did not calm the people down and/or inform us that we were experiencing heavy turbulence or flying through some air pockets.

I wanted to hear from the pilot during or afterwards.

I wanted to know that everything will be okay.

I wanted to know that this was heavy turbulence and would last for another??? minutes.

The absence of hearing from the pilot put everyone in a state of shock, including myself.  My legs were shaking, my heart felt like it was about to pop out of my chest, and my hands were hurting from holding on to my seat with all my might to avoid bumping my head.

So here are three lessons I learned from my horrific Jet Blue flight:

  1. Always communicate, give people a heads up on what to expect
  2. Be sensitive to others needs
  3. Never eat before you take a Jet Blue flight


Please feel free to share your horrific flight story.


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How to find comfort in the uncomfortable zone

Welcome to a new day and a new opportunity to do better and be better.


Today is a great day to step out to be brave and bold.  I know you hear this all the time, “get out of your comfort zone”. What does this really mean?  When I first heard this saying I said to myself, “I am not in my comfort zone, I am quite uncomfortable with how my life is operating”. I was broke, single mom with lots of expenses and not enough money or time. All I had was potential. I was used to luxury cars, having nice things and the ability to do what I want, when I wanted with my kids. So stepping out of my comfort zone was a statement that just pissed me off every time the cashier would yell, “your card declined Miss”, or the ATM machine would hand me an insufficient funds receipt instead of the cash I requested.

Today is a new day. Today is a new year and today marks a fresh start for me to do better and to be better.  My journey from broke as a joke to feeling slap happy as my grandfather would say, required me to be more than uncomfortable. It required me to be comfortable in the uncomfortable, if that makes any sense to you.

My life changed in 2006 when I turned away from the predictable, cliché, and reliable ways of being. I had to evaluate what was working in my life and what was hindering me from excelling.

I needed a fresh start. I needed to get my groove back. The answers to these questions changed my dry season of broke to a season being bold and brave enough to embrace uncomfortable opportunities.

If you were starting from scratch, and you wanted to make an income offering your advice and how-to information to the world, what 5 things should you focus on?

If you wanted to become a highly-paid expert in a matter of months, based on what you already know and have lived through, what would you need to do first?

This incredible event with me, Lucinda Cross and a few other experts will answer these questions for you. On November 2nd-4th you are invited to attend the Activate Your L.I.F.E 3 day Incubator. We are offering a 2 for 1 deal.  We are encouraging everyone to bring someone along. Click here for more information.


Love and Light,

Lucinda Cross


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